Internal Dialogue

I came to some "understanding" if you can call it that, of what Renard and The Course of Miracles teach. I came to it by the back door, it would seem, since I didn't recall having done anything to gain this knowledge. It was only later, reading The Tao of Physics, A Course in Miracles, and the Gospel of John that I began to understand what happenned to me in that "instant".

I did not meditate, read, or do anything, I did not seek for what I could have not even imagined. All I remember is I drank, sang and danced all night in Puerto Vallarta, I forgot past and future, only lived in the now that night and then I walked into this: one love, one being, one person made up of everyone that ever existed and will be. There was no past and no future, only the eternal now and everything that ever was and would happen had happenned already????? I read Dante, I read Merton and they all speak to this. Now , what was that i did? maybe this: I did not hold something against a loved one. In my world i had nothing to forgive, I just loved. Was that my ticket? it is the only ting I can claim, the rest was Grace. I always tried to "understand" intellectually. What a dumb ass, we only "know" with our heart.